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Ghamrawi, Nour

Page history last edited by mike 8 years, 12 months ago

project 3 - extremely rough draft

Greed, it is something that affects our everyday lives. It ruins and enriches people, it is all around us and sometimes impossible to avoid. “Greed is an inordinate desire to acquire or possess more than one needs or deserves. It is typically used to criticize those who seek excessive material wealth, although it may apply to the need to feel more excessively moral, social, or otherwise better than someone else,” (Wikipedia). Greed today is found almost everywhere, it is found in the cafeteria, in corporations, in school, in families, and those are just some examples. But what is Greed really? What does it mean, what does it take to be greedy, how do you become greedy, and is it good or bad to be greedy?

Greed is a malleable concept, sometimes good sometimes bad.  I will define greed as religious concept, where it is typically a vice to be condemned, and in psychology as a dysfunctional way of thinking.

 

 

START WITH THOSE MAKING THE 'GREED IS GOOD ARGUMENT' ... HERE:

 

 


Greed, it is something that affects our everyday lives. It ruins and enriches people, it is all around us, and sometimes, impossible to avoid. “Greed is an inordinate desire to acquire or possess more than one needs or deserves. It is typically used to criticize those who seek excessive material wealth, although it may apply to the need to feel more excessively moral, social, or otherwise better than someone else,” (Wikipedia). Greed today is found almost everywhere, it is found in the cafeteria, in corporations, in school, in families, and those are just some examples[M1] . But what is Greed really? What does it mean,? what What does it take to be greedy,? how How do you become greedy,? and is it good or bad to be greedy[M2] ?

When considering greed through a majority of religions it is said to be negative. Most religions say that greed and desire are often confused and sometimes desire is taken too far that it turns into greed. Many religions encourage donating and suggest that if a person is comfortable financially he/she should put their money to good use or use Itit to help people in need. An example is in Buddhism,; greed is not good [M3] and it is one of the three poisons part of their religion that lead to evil. In Christianity, gGreed is also frowned upon., tThe bible summarizes greed and says that it is something that will never be satisfied and that a greedy person ends up valuing materials more than god. The Islamic religion is also against greed, and sincebecause I am Muslim I will go a little more in depth. [M4] Greed is a vice in Islam because it is an act of selfishness, it disorts one’s character, it makes them arrogant, it leads to the corruption of society, it undermines ones love for good as well as decrease values such as justice, fairness and compassion. Many religions share a common view, such as that of the Christians and Muslims. They believe that the human being cannot serve both good and greed at the same time and, therefore, must choose one. That choice hopefully is[M5]  god, and as a collaborative effort we should try to remove the structures and attitudes that support greed.

  1.  
  2. Yes

 

  1. How strong are the criteria that the writer is using to compose their definition? Can you think of any items that also match the criteria used that the writer (as far as you can tell) would likely not want to be included the category being defined?

No

 

  1.  
  2. Wanting to make money isn’t greed. It is what America was founded on. (bs if you ask me).

 

4. What do you take to be the strongest element of this project?

The bit on religion.

 

5. What do you find to be the weakest part (most in need of improvement) of the project?

 More can be done with the religion part if some research is done. You could also include sociocultural points, as well.

  1. On the sentence-level, did you find the paper to be well written? Does it contain poor grammmar or sentence-fragments? Does it include "run-on" sentences? Is it unnecessarily wordy at times?

It contained a few mistakes, but nothing spell checker can’t fix.

 

  1.  
  2. Somewhat. Make the paper more unique to ‘now’, although greed is a timeless folly of human nature.

 

  1. What grade would you assign this project if this were the final draft?

 

C+. The idea needs development and there are some syntax errors, but I feel that this paper has great potential.


 [M1]Consider replace with, “To name a few examples”

 [M2]Consider revising: Is greed a good or a bad thing?

 [M3]Bad? Find a nifty word to replace bad on thesaurus.com

 [M4]Might be irrelevant to the argument.

 [M5]Switch them around.

 

THEN THE REST OF YOU PAPER EXPLAINS THAT RELIGION AND PSYCH PROVE THEM WRONG.

When considering greed through a majority of religions it is said to be negative. Most religions say that greed and desire are often confused and sometimes desire is taken too far that it turns into greed. Many religions encourage donating and suggest that if a person is comfortable financially he/she should put their money to good use or use It to help people in need. An example is in Buddhism, greed is not good and it is one of the three poisons part of their religion that lead to evil. In Christianity Greed is also frowned upon, the bible summarizes greed and says that it is something that will never be satisfied and that a greedy person ends up valuing materials more than god. The Islamic religion is also against greed, and since I am Muslim I will go a little more in depth. Greed is a vice in Islam because it is an act of selfishness, it disorts one’s character, it makes them arrogant, it leads to the corruption of society, it undermines ones love for good as well as decrease values such as justice, fairness and compassion. Many religions share a common view, such as that of the Christians and Muslims. They believe that the human being cannot serve both good and greed at the same time and therefore must choose one. That choice hopefully is god, and as a collaborative effort we should try to remove the structures and attitudes that support greed.

 

 

 

http://www.just-international.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=4771:god-or-greed--a-muslim-view&catid=45:recent-articles&Itemid=123

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A)
Discourse Community: My discourse community is found in major corporations and in organizations that oppose Wall Street and the way organizations function. There are many organization groups that rally against corporations and show people how corporations are treating people all over the world such as putting them in sweatshops, paying less then minimum wage, abuse, and many more.

B)
I plan to use cause and effect in my paper, what greed is how it’s caused and how it effects society.
                -Greed, the selfish and unethical actions of one that effects the world as we know it resulting in
                poverty and unfair treatment.

C)

I will probably be using a formal definition to first introduce my paper and to inform the reader what my paper will be about. The second type of definition I will use is an application to a hard case definition where I can relate the definition to the examples.

D)

 

 

Project 1Response.docx

 

Women on billboards, in magazines, in commercials, and on the runway, all of them display what it means and looks to be beautiful. However, the question arises, is this image that is being broadcasted to the world as a definition of what beauty really is true? This image that has been portrayed by the media affects everyone, it not only sets a false image for younger girls and women to look up to and try to compare with but also it sets this image   for men that women have to look like that in order to be beautiful. Dove is here to change that, here to set things right, and support true beauty.
            Dove is a company known for its hygiene products, such as its shampoo and soap. When someone thinks of Dove one of the first things that come to many people’s mind is “clean”. Dove created a commercial that shows a regular woman coming into the studio getting makeup done, her hair done, which is all pretty normal, however after the shoot the images are uploaded to a computer and altered drastically with Photoshop and then the image is posted on a billboard. Comparing the regular image of the woman to the final product shows a huge difference and almost an impossible one, and Dove knows this. Dove is trying to keep the world clean, not only through their products, however also supporting the world with a clean image of beauty.
            “Imagine a world where every girl grows up with the self-esteem she needs to reach her full potential, and where every woman enjoys feeling confident in her own beauty. Imagine the world of possibilities we can open up by helping to build self-esteem in the people we love most.” That is a direct quote from Dove’s campaign for real beauty website. Dove wants to build a world where women everywhere have the tools to inspire each other and look up to real beauty as opposed to the unhealthy/impossible beauty.
            It all began with surveys that were distributed to 3,200 woman across ten countries including the U.S. and Canada. The results of these surveys were troubling, only two percent of these woman described themselves as beautiful, half of them thought their weight was too high, and ninety percent of woman said they want to change at least one thing about their physical appearance. You might ask yourself, why are all these woman unsatisfied with what they have and why do they want to change themselves? Dove realized that it couldn’t have been pure intuition for all these woman to think alike and negatively about themselves, and then knew what the problem was and what had to be done.
            The first commercial part of this beauty campaign by Dove aired during the 2006 Superbowl which is viewed by millions and millions of people all across the world. The commercial cost Dove 2.1 million dollars. It wasn’t your average advertisement, no specific product was being advertised and no donations were requested. The commercial consisted of a  group of girls who were unsatisfied with their physical appearance, and ended with the article saying let’s change their minds since every girl deserves to feel good about herself. The commercial ended off by asking the viewers to join their campaign for beauty, and that hour thousands of people joined it, and today there are over five million members to this campaign.

            That Superbowl commercial was a huge success and definetly delivered its message across better than other ads. Due to the positive responses Dove continued in its campaign and released tons of commercials. The first commercial released during the Superbowl relates heavily to pathos, the commercial is targeting the audience through an emotional perspective and is attempting to have the audience react emotionally. The target audience in that commercial was mainly geared toward woman and younger girls, however it affected much more than that. I believe after fathers and mothers seen that type of commercial they also wanted to be more supportive to their children’s physical appearance and instill confidence within their children.
            The other commercial Dove produced was one called “Evolution” this commercial attracted tons of attention, both positive and negative. The commercial used a form of logos while using a set of logical steps on how woman went to the photoshoot and what the modeling process was like. Dove claimed that it was just an ordinary women, however after work on Photoshop she was able to look like what she looks like and the final product almost looks nothing like the woman. Many people liked this commercial since it made them feel better about themselves and it showed them how the truth really was, that it was impossible to acquire a physique of such. However, some people such as the models took it really negatively because there are real models out there that actual are modeling there real selves and they don’t want this stereotype coming out where everyone begins to believe that all models alter their image through technology.

 

Peer Review 2: Ahmed Alshaibani.

 

http://www.dove.ca/en/Social-Mission/About-the-Movement.aspx

http://psucomm473.blogspot.com/2007/03/dove-campaign-for-real-beauty-case.html

http://www.media-awareness.ca/english/resources/educational/teachable_moments/campaignrealbeauty.cfm

 

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